Monday, January 28, 2008

Dog Run News

by, Roberta Bayley

Sunday night I saw the perfect acceptance speech at the SAG Awards from my new heart throb Javier Bardem. He looked great, spoke clearly, and remembered to thank his fellow nominees - almost no one else did! If Javier and Penelope Cruz decide to procreate, it will be the greatest gene pool since Catherine Deneuve and Marcello Mastroianni spawned Chiara.
Larry would like to register a formal complaint regarding the term Outsider Art. The concept is one of his pet peeves. "I mean, what does it mean?" he fumed, "That you're not a white male? Don't get me wrong", he continued, "I love folk art, I think that it's great, but why do they have to call it Outsider Art? Just because a black person did it? I don't get it." [Disclosure: Larry is a white male.]

The New York Times is on Larry's side (I think). "Some people think the label 'outsider artist' should be retired", wrote Ken Johnson on Friday. "Why does it matter whether an artist is self-taught, mentally impaired or deranged? Perhaps there should be an independent agency to certify artists as authentic outsiders." Larry will undoubtedly not have time to be a part of that agency - maybe as a consultant? And where does Kim stand on all this? We know she collects outsider art, but then let's be honest, she collects all of her friend's art and the vast majority of them would certainly qualify as deranged. It's a complex issue, and one we will explore more deeply. Maybe in 2009.

While I am working with the scientists on "I Can't Believe It's not Tuna!", some of you have been asking "Well, what fish can I safely eat?" Here a simple link on the subject:

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/05/31/dining/31fbox.html

That list is based on which fish are healthy to eat. As far as which fish are environmentally sound to eat (i.e. not over-fished or in danger of extinction), you will need another list:

http://www.environmentaldefense.org/page.cfm?tagID=1521
Here is a chart telling you how often it is safe to eat environmentally sound fish:

http://www.environmentaldefense.org/page.cfm?tagID=17694
I think the trick is to find a few fish you enjoy eating and stick with them. Confession: I had a tuna sandwich yesterday.

Doug and Narelle have progressed in their battle against jet lag and Return From Paradise Syndrome and are waking up at 9:45 instead of 2:30. Perhaps if they master Mapquest, they may even find the new Dog Run one day. Doug weighs in on "Diving Bell & The Butterflyl" a film both Kim and I thought was wonderful, if a tad dark:

we saw "the diving bell" yesterday. that's pretty extraordinary. amazing imagery, colours, and textures. the way it's been shot with ultra shallow depth of field from his p.o.v contrasted with vast tableaux for the outdoor shots should win the d.p an oscar. the acting by almaric and the girls is excellent, and the story very very deftly handled by julian schnabel (considering basquiat). best film of the year hands down. glad that i saw it because it's really much better and tighter than oscar faves "there will be blood" or "no country" which will no doubt win everything by default. daniel day lewis possibly the exception.

That's all for today, my friends. Be well.
Sidney & Roberta

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Dog Run News: Hello Strangers!

by, Roberta Bayley

Some of our phantom Dog Run people have resurfaced, though they will still not be immediately visible. Doug and Narelle have returned from Australia They are having a hard time adjusting to the cold temperature and from jet lag and. Doug describes their adventures down under thusly:

tree house living in the daintree rainforest,
swimming with dolphins, diving off the barrier reef,
or feeding the flocks of parrots and cockatoos in
narelle's parents's yard......you get the idea.

No wonder the bleakness of New York winter is a hard adjustment! He gives us his take on the film "Savages" with Laura Linney & PSH (no, not a feminine hygiene product - the actor!)

quite depressing, though at times
disarmingly funny story about facing old age and
death. phillip seymour hoffman's always worth a watch
but i couldn't recommend it without feeling a little
sadistic!

Jessica, never one to fear a charge of sadism, highly recommends "Savages". She also highly recommends "4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days" while cautioning it is not for the faint of heart in it's grim depiction of an illegal abortion in 1987 Romania.

Everyone (Doug, Rags, James, Jessica, Bruce, etc.) seems to have seen "There Will Be Blood" but no one has yet to give it a whole hearted recommendation. While Daniel Day Lewis is commended for his performance, most people thought it was just too long, with a lackluster finish. Rags is hoping they will bring out shorter version on DVD.

Now from our other missing in action drama critic, Dr Bob, from Pennsylvania. Here are his two reviews:

SWEENEY TODD
It has been my experience that three-ways rarely work out. [Ed. note: Tell me about it.] This is one
time, when one does. The mating of Sondheim, Burton and Depp is perfect. And at the very least, and at last, this masterpiece of writing-has made it to the screen.,

THE ORPHANAGE
This is basically a good B movie with incredible acting, terrific locales, and really snazzy direction. It is more intelligent than Poltergeist or The Others. It is a tale well told. And who doesn't enjoy a good ghost story?

Apparently there are few free-walking dogs where Bob and Waldo are living. Though they have heard dogs barking, they rarely see any. Nonetheless, Waldo is enjoying himself, and Bob is finding his fellowship to be rewarding in many ways. The food in the area, however, leaves much to be desired. We are sending Larry and Trish to Pennsylvania with a care package.

Meanwhile I am working with some scientists I met yesterday, to create a synthetic raw mercury free tuna product. It will be called "I Can't Believe It's Not Tuna!" and should be in stores in 2009.

Rudy Giuliani's campaign seems to be fizzling, that should cheer some of us up. Today the eight page Police Dept. memorandum written in 1998 was released, giving many detailed reasons why putting The Emergency Command Center in 7 World Trade Center was a really bad idea. But Rudy wanted to be able to walk there from City Hall. Oops.

Here is a good site if you want to stop getting all those catalogues in the mail: http://catalogchoice.org

It's free. You just register and enter which catalogues you would prefer not to receive, and they cancel them for you.

If you have a chance visit the Outsider Art Fair 2008 in the puck Building today & tomorrow, 11 to 7. It will make clear to you that art by criminals, perverts and the mentally challenged (I guess that includes all of us) is more interesting than "real" art.

That's all folks!

Roberta & Sidney

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Dog Run News: The Return of Bruce

by, Roberta Bayley

Not Doug Bruce (we still have that to look forward to) but Bruce McV, father of Sophie and Lily, husband of Carol. Bruce has been travelling in the cities of Prague and Budapest. He did not encounter any lice, though the "young people" of the hostels seemed to view his somewhat grizzled appearance as scary, so he soon shaved off his beard and regained the vigorous handsomeness we have come to expect (except when he's playing a psycho on "Law & Order"). Bruce preferred Budapest to Prague, saying that while both cities are beautiful, Budapest had a run down grittiness reminiscent of 80s New York - lots of smoking, drinking and people bustling in the streets. Bruce attended a few bath houses, some very old, but as soon as he witnessed some man on man sexual activity, he fled, unscathed. (Not that there's anything wrong with it.)

We continue to be saddened by the passing of Heath Ledger, especially so soon after the death of Brad Renfrow. They say these things come in threes, but I am hoping Suzanne Pleschette's passing was number two. Not to say we were not fans of the gravel voiced actress, au contraire. It's just that she had lived a long life, and had even outlived both of her husbands, and even had time to write her own eulogy! "Rome Adventure" was a favorite in my pre-teen years, with the song "Al Di La" I am right back there. I'd forgotten that she married to her co-star in that film, Troy Donahue. And then had a late in life marriage to old beau Tom Poston. And of course her role as Annie in "The Birds" (my parrot's all time favorite film) can never be forgotten. Good-bye funny lady, good bye, handsome young men.

The alarms regarding mercury levels in tuna continues after a New York Times front page story about high levels of mercury in many New York sushi restaurants, even Nobu and other high end spots. Please limit your tuna intake to once a week or less, if possible.

Jessica (Briscoe's mom) gives us the lowdown on two current films:

Cassandra's Dream: A poor man's "Before The Devil
Knows You're Dead". Come to think of it, a poor man's
"Match Point". So no reason why Woody redid what
worked so well the first time. Having said that,
Colin Farrell, who I never thought twice about, was
quite good and I would love to see him in something
great.

[Editors note: Larry also reported being "underwhelmed" by this film.]

27 Dresses: Inane, and I LOVED every minute of it.
Give me a good outfit changing montage and expensive
NYC real estate that an assistant seems to be able to
afford and I am in heaven.

[This is why Jessica's opinions are so useful. You can tell from her "rave" whether it's for you or not. Or whether you wait till it's on free cable].

We have asked Dr. Bob to give us his opinions on recent films also, and are hoping for a Siskel and Ebert teaming of Bob with Jessica.

Fashion fans, don't miss Kim's blog http://papermag.com/blogs/fashion_schmashion/

I've already written a letter to John Galliano asking him to design uniforms for Washington Square Parks Department!

Lindsay Lohan will be on the cover of PAPER soon - see a behind the scenes shot here:

http://www.papermag.com/blogs/mr_mickey/

She's so pretty it should be illegal.

That's all for now, folks!

Roberta & Sidney

Friday, January 18, 2008

Dog Run News: Tuesday

by, Roberta Bayley

There have been several complaints that there is a serious lack of A-
list dogs at the run of late (You KNOW who you are!) While the chilly
weather and winter vacations may account for some absences, and the
new run is not to everyone's taste, and the journey for some is
longer, please, when weather permits, do show up! We miss you.
Besides, who can we get our movie reviews from, Jessica? And Isaac
Mizrahi has left Target! We're dying to get the inside, Kim.

Bruce has gone on an adventure to Prague and Budapest. We can't wait
to hear his report of his journey. We are hoping he did not get lice
in the youth hostel.

Gizzies Coffee attempted to bring caffeine to the dog run but he
appears to have given up after two days. The general feeling was he
did not market himself correctly. Such is life.

ALERT: Ajax's wart finally fell off without medical intervention. We
held a small champagne toast in his honor (well, Sidney and I did
anyway.)

Our own Jamie Leonhart was featured in a lovely photograph in the New
York Times, singing back up for a singer (who's name escapes me,
sorry) who has a show of all Laura Nyro covers. The show got an
excellent review from Stephen Holden.

Sadly, we learned today that Brad Renfro, the charming 12 year old
who starred with Susan Sarandon and Tommy Lee Jones in "The Client",
died yesterday at the age of 25. Foul play was not suspected. Renfro
had struggled with drug addiction.

Hero of the Week: Wesley Snipes. The "Blade" actor who has made 38
million dollars since 1997, and has not paid taxes since 1999, is
suing the U.S. government. He claims that he wasn't aware that he was
required to pay income taxes. Go Wesley!

Tooting My Own Horn Dept. : My letter supporting the Park renovation
was published in The Villager. The Park Renovation people called me
at home to thank me! They will keep me updated on all developments.
They seem to be working hard to please us, the Dog Run people.

That's all folks - you obviously haven't missed much!

Roberta and Sidney

The Miracle of the Mounds


by Roberta Bayley,


Today we lucky few witnessed a Miracle. As Larry and George were leaving the run, they noticed a small dog playing on the Mounds near a pile of dirt. As there was a hole in the fence, George ran in and began to play. Hachiko and Christina approached and followed Sidney and I into the Mounds. Then the miracle happened:

Sidney ran.

Yes, it's true. She ran up the Mounds and down the Mounds, with George and Hachiko in hot pursuit.

We stood at the top of the Mounds in the golden sunlight , gazed down on the drug dealers plying their trade, and came to understand the Mounds in a new way. And we vowed to save them. We are saying something we thought we would never say:

Save the Mounds!

Roberta & Sidney




Monday, December 31, 2007

Dog Run News: a Digital Memoir for 2008

1st post
by, Roberta Bayley

Saturday:

Natt is in Florida until January 8th. Some dogs have chosen to wear black arm bands until her return, in response to a request by Sidney.

Larry saw Will Smith's "I Am Legend" and said the Washington Square Park scene is "about a minute" long.

Lily does not like the new surface in the run, Bruce reports.

Henry stunned everyone with a religious themed outfit, with gold highlights, depicting a Madonna (no not that one).

Doug and Narelle have gone to Australia for New Year's. Doug apparently came to the run to say good-bye but of course it had moved and he couldn't find us!

Patricia McGee (president of the big dog run) had the following letter published in The Viilager:

"To the editor:

Michael Bloomberg made his mark. He destroyed Washington Square Park."

Go, Patty!

Ajax's wart has not dropped off, much to Claudia's dismay.

Two tiny super cute dogs came to the run today, Mojo & Moxie. When asked what the breed was, the owner said they were Cantells. Everyone was confused until we realized the joke: You Cant Tell what they are!

Meanwhile, other non dog run sad news: my Sicilian shoe repair guy Angelo Fontana (across from St. Marks Church) is losing his lease after 40 years. My Russian tailor and drycleaner Michael (next door) will probably suffer the same fate in July. I guess we'll be getting a few more banks...

So that's the update. Jessica - Please forward to Dr. Bob and tell him everyone misses him. If anyone has Rachel (Ellie's mom) e-mail, please forward. I can't find Bruce's e-mail. Forward to anyone you think might be interested.

Sunday:

The run was super busy today, lots of dogs!

A new incredibly cute dog arrived today: Buttercup, a Norwich Jack Russell. Only Sidney did not warm to her (one less treat for me).

Sunday Times features Kim Hastrieter's piece on what New York will be like in 2018 - it's hilarious! Page 7 of the City Section, part of the World of Tomorrow piece.

Also there is a great obituary on Hugh Massingbird, former obituary writer for The Telegraph of London. Page 26 of the Metro Section. Trust me, it's funny. For Larry, please read the Automobile section, where you can learn a LOT about the Audi, as both the Audi R8 and Audi S5 are reviewed in detail. More than enough to get you through the next weekend with your relatives.

As for the Post, the mother of a Hannah Montana fan whose 6 year old daughter won tickets to an upcoming concert in an essay contest, was shocked, SHOCKED to learn that the essays were supposed to be TRUE. The daughter submitted an essay stating in part that "My daddy died in Iraq and I'm going to give mommy the angel pendant that daddy put on mommy when she was having me". None of it was true. The tickets were not awarded. And one tiny girl's heart is broken.

The e-mail circulating regarding Derek Berg owner of Nikita is full of misinformation. Apparently he paid the vet bill of Ralphie immediately upon receiving it. The movement to have Nikita banned from the dog run continues, though Derek will resist.

See you at the alligator run!

Update: If you missed the Sunday Times, the alligator reference is to Kim's description of a future New York where due to global warming alligators have become rampant and are cultivated as family pets, hence the alligator runs.

Also: feeling guilty, Pat is taking Ajax to the vet for wart removal.


Best,

Roberta & Sidney